Post by Darrin McCann on Oct 13, 2016 17:43:03 GMT -6
**REVIEW** - Avery Strange | 1.01 Pilot
I just finished reading the Pilot and I have to agree with some of the points made above. I believe that you did a great job with the introductions of your characters and the teaser got right to the point of what this episode was going to be about. I agree with some of the comments above about the introduction of the paranormal element and the lack of certain amazement. To me it's more of a matter of how do you make your ghosts stand out from any other. What makes your ghosts different, original, what makes Avery Strange ghosts unique. I think the one element I really enjoyed, besides the strong dialogue banter between Avery and Fish, was his nightmare of his brother. Is his brother a ghost? Is his brother's apparition simply a thought inside his head manifesting itself? That's probably been my favorite part of this series since the beginning. The mystery surrounding Evan Strange... I mean Strong. Lol. I have to admit a part of me really misses the crypto-element earlier drafts of this series had. I look forward to how all this ghost mystery ties into his brother's death, if it ties in at all or if there's something else at play. Overall it was a good Pilot. The usually SPAG errors, nothing a few reads and edits can't fix. The introductions were solid, the dialogue was solid. Great job!
I just finished reading the Pilot and I have to agree with some of the points made above. I believe that you did a great job with the introductions of your characters and the teaser got right to the point of what this episode was going to be about. I agree with some of the comments above about the introduction of the paranormal element and the lack of certain amazement. To me it's more of a matter of how do you make your ghosts stand out from any other. What makes your ghosts different, original, what makes Avery Strange ghosts unique. I think the one element I really enjoyed, besides the strong dialogue banter between Avery and Fish, was his nightmare of his brother. Is his brother a ghost? Is his brother's apparition simply a thought inside his head manifesting itself? That's probably been my favorite part of this series since the beginning. The mystery surrounding Evan Strange... I mean Strong. Lol. I have to admit a part of me really misses the crypto-element earlier drafts of this series had. I look forward to how all this ghost mystery ties into his brother's death, if it ties in at all or if there's something else at play. Overall it was a good Pilot. The usually SPAG errors, nothing a few reads and edits can't fix. The introductions were solid, the dialogue was solid. Great job!
