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Post by stevieg on Mar 4, 2012 5:13:27 GMT -6
This does sound a really good concept for a show. And keeping each series small and focused on one story allows it to stay focused on a fairy tale each season which is an interesting idea.
Love the trailer, written very well and I'm sure this series could do well here. Only know the 2 older stars in the cast but they others fit well from what you wrote about them.
Certainly like to read a pilot and see how you move forward with this pitch. It has an element of the past and mystery shrouded with action and adventure thrown together.
Fairy Tales I have imagined to always have them darker edges to the stories, which are very rarely explored and shown so this is down that alley of showing that side to the tales.
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Post by stevieg on Mar 4, 2012 5:00:24 GMT -6
Thanks Aimee for your comments I think clues are there of what the show will be about - a group of people who work together to protect humanity from creatures and demons etc. But these people aren't just normal, they are all 'cursed' as I call them with their own elements to what makes them different to humanity. Kind of, Creatures fighting Creatures in a way but on the good side. I went through a couple of cast changes over time - as this has been planned for about 1-2 years now from rough idea to written scripts, but I think I'm happy with the final casting now. I think episodes 2, 5 and 6 are my favourites I have wrote so far, with 2 and 5 delving into backgrounds of 2 of the characters and what lead them to where they are now. Season One will have an overall arc playing out in the background, culminating in the season finale - while other things go on in most of the episodes, ie. cases to resolve and creatures to stop/help. Be interested to see what people think of the Pilot.
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Post by stevieg on Mar 3, 2012 17:33:48 GMT -6
They are monsters.... created by the past.... to protect our future.THE PREMISE:Emily Talbot is the new girl in a new city. A normal sixteen year old teenage girl, or so she always was lead to believe. But Emily isn't aware that she is 'cursed', a life that goes back to her great Uncle many years ago, and now whose blood runs inside of her.
As bodies begin to be discovered, a group of extraordinary people lead by the mysterious Bela Harker look to Emily for answers. As Emily begins to learn her true nature, her 'Curse' .... she begins a journey where the bizarre, the weird and wonderful are brought to life in front of her eyes.
A world protected from humanity for the best. A world, where danger lurks and death is often only a heartbeat away...... but first, she must survive facing her own nightmare of what she really is. THE CAST:played by Michelle RyanBela is the leader of the group known as 'Universal'. A mysterious, English young woman, with secrets of her past hidden to guard those around her, but soon discovered over time. Wise. Smart. Caring. She will go out the way to protect her team, even at her own cost. The mystery of who she is, what made her, is in her past ...... and the darkness inside of her, may lead to her downfall!played by AnnaSophia RobbA sixteen year old, seemingly normal teenager. Until one day she discovers the truth about herself, and who she really is. Coming to terms with the truth, she sets out on a mission to become part of 'Universal' - using her 'curse' to help the team. Young. Nieve. Caring. She finds it hard to adjust to her new life, as her feelings of all that is happening begins to doubt question wether she has made the right decision.Also starring:played by Skandar KeynesSimon Harker is a distant relation to Bela Harker. Although he himself, is not 'cursed', his intelligence in learning about the world and his family history through Bela lead him to become part of the group. Part Hunter / Part Researcher. He grows a fondness towards Emily from the start, as well as trying to be protective of Bela who may not require it. He has conflicts occasionally with J.J. who he doesn't like.played by Jamie BellJ.J. as he is mostly commonly refered to by the Universal team, is a mysterious, dark and often moody at times young man. His goth dress sense and seemingly love for anything dark and strange leads the others to sometimes keep their distance from him, which suits him fine. His 'Curse' stems from his family, who passed it down to be used for good, and not evil but the side effects still haven't been cured. He enjoys using his 'curse' to watch others - especially women, almost stalking them at times to his own sexual desires.played by Clement PoesyChristine Daee was a leading acrobat in a circus in Paris many years ago, following in her parent's footsteps. Unfortunately, an incident took place which lead to her parents death, and her career brought to an abrupt end. Running away, she made a decision that impacted upon her future life, taking vengeance upon those who brought harm to others, turning heself into a masked vigilante known only as 'The Phantom' who striked fear in the hearts of the Paris underworld. Discovered by Bela escaping from Paris, after she was forced to flee on the run from the police, she was soon recruited to the team and found herself a new home. And the hope one day, that she will find one soul that will break her curse for the life she once took that began it all.played by Troian BellisarioAnka, is an Egyptian young woman, who seemed to appear from nowhere in the early part of the 21st century, with much of her past still unknown. Smart. Agile. A quick learner. She has a curse that has given her life beyond death. But now, she has settled into her new home, and found a calling she sought after as part of the Universal team. She is also 2nd in command behind Bela Harker.Also co-starring:played by Nicholas HoultFrederick or Doc to the team as he is known to be called, is an all around lab geek. Although he, like Simon Harker is not 'cursed', he leads the field in his intelligence and genius in the art of science, psychology and medicine. The leading physician for the Unit, who patches the team up and helps them survive after their assignments when required upon. His love for medical work seems to be only matched for his passion for experiments and learning more about other 'creatures' captured. His experiments can often cause conflict with Bela who recruited him after seeing the brilliant young mind he had. played by Kirsten ProutGilly is a seemingly mute young woman. In her late 20's, little is known about her as more will be learned of her over time, but she has a soft caring side towards Frederick, who also recipitates his fondness towards her in return. Gilly is often discovered down in the Laboratory area with the Doc. Not a fully fledged member of the team, her calling will soon be answered over time with a mission only she can help out on. EPISODE GUIDE (First Half of Season One):Click banner to read online - or download Pilot Script! Episode 1x01: Everything Changes .... ? (Pilot Episode) -- 76 Pages As some form of creature seems to be killing people in the forest close to the city of Serenity Falls, a seemingly innocent young girl arrives on her own. Emily Talbot is soon to learn that she isn't all she thought she was, and that the truth about who she really is, her family history, and the world around her is to be blown wide apart. But can she believe, or survive what exists within her....? OTHER EPISODES:Episode 1x02: Nightmares!As Anka and Christine are sent out to capture a horrible little goblin demon known as a 'Nightmare'. They travel back and listen to a story he tells of the time he met a woman named 'Bela Harker'. While Bela herself recalls tales of her past few know. A story told with flashbacks of Bela's early life as we see from birth, to pivotal moments of time with her parents that helped shape who she is.Episode 1x03: Ashes To Ashes.... Dust To Dust!When a serious car accident causes the death of the woman he loves, the survivor is given an opportunity for her resurrection by a mysterious stranger. But at what price, does love cost?Episode 1x04: Elements!At a High School, a teenager suffers an horrific and bloody death in front of his classmates. As Bela sends the team to investigate, they find themselves up against a force more powerful than they imagined.Episode 1x05: Burn Baby Burn!Bela receives a call asking for help to protect a young boy with an incredible gift, as the whole case draws too close for Christine who recalls a tale of her own past. A story told with flashbacks to Christine's early life, and what lead to her curse.Episode 1x06: Deep Steal Diving!After an horrific and violent death is discovered in the ocean surrounding a small fishing town. Bela sends the team to invstigate, and discover something that lurks beneath the ocean has risen and require help from a new recruit.1x07: If You Go Down To The Woods Today....?Bela leads the team to a cabin in the woods, far away from the city to bond. But as she recalls a story of what the cabin means to her - told in flashbacks, informing us of the reasons of what lead Bela to form Universal, a group of Mercenaries close in to kill them all.
Second part of Season One will feature 5 more episodes (Possibly a special afterwards). Final two I am planning to be a two-part cliffhanger ending. I still need a bit of work on the second half of the season, as most are just rough ideas at moment of a few lines of ideas of what I am thinking of doing in them with no drafts written yet of those. Early Ideas of Future Episodes:1x08: Hollow!J.J. finds himself in trouble, when he is caught by the Police inside a locked room with a dead woman's body on the bed. Bela and the Unit find themselves split over wether to prove his innocence. Contains flashbacks of J.J.'s life and how he became cursed. 1x09: Medusa!When men suddenly start being discovered turned to stone, the Unit are called in to solve the case and find themselves up against something that is hard to resist for the men in the group. 1x10: The Sphinx!Anka is asked by an old friend to help out when a murder takes place at the Museum & History of Egypt, but soon discovers her past is returning to haunt her. Contains flashbacks to Anka's past life in Egypt two thousand years ago. 1x11: All Good Things..... (Part 1 of 2 Season Finale) Bela begins to have terrible nightmares, seeing victims she once killed in her past appear and speak to her. Driving herself insane, she finds herself seeking guidance from the rest of her team to help her.... 1x12: ..... Must Come To An End! (Part 2 of 2 Season Finale) With one member of the Unit kidnapped, Bela finds herself trading her life for those she cares about. And discovers a truth about her past she didn't know..... Notes:I have pitched this elsewhere (MZP) but sadly had no feedback on the script etc, so I'm throwing it out on here to see what you all think of it and if interested The concept of the show is based on my love for the original Universal Classic Monster Legacy movies. The old classic b&w horror films of the 40's etc that starred the true legends of horror like Lugosi, Karloff, Chaney and more. The show is also inspired by things like Buffy, Angel and others of this genre. The show itself focuses on a group of young adults, who each are cursed. Bela Harker, brought them all together to help protect humanity from the creatures and evil that exists in the world. Each of the team bring something unique into the group, and all linked to their past heritage of family history that goes back generations from the Universal Horror Legacy Collection. From Vampires to Werewolves, Mummy's to Invisible Man, Phantoms to Demons and much more..... Early first drafts written of the first 7 episodes of Season 1 with episode 1 (pilot) available to read above in link from banner. Any feedback welcome on it.
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Post by stevieg on Mar 3, 2012 16:15:40 GMT -6
This does look like an interesting film pitch. It leaves a lot of mystery behind it which leaves me intrugued on what you might do with it. Good casting also.
Hope you get this written and approved as sounds like a good film concept and wouldn't mind giving it a read.
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Post by stevieg on Mar 3, 2012 15:55:45 GMT -6
Nice new name used and icons for episodes created
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Post by stevieg on Mar 3, 2012 11:31:51 GMT -6
I've never read the books unfortunately, but if as good as the series then I'll have to add them to my list of reading materials
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Post by stevieg on Mar 3, 2012 5:20:35 GMT -6
The Snow White film does look good, I'll admit even if not too much a fan of Stewart. Theron looks beautiful as always, and Hemsworth looks perfect for his role. Only issue I got is damn Ray Winstone in the film, cant stand the guy but I'll watch it probably and try and ignore him in it.
The effects look fantastic, and a good few battle scenes it appears from the trailer which is nice. I'd give this a look just to see how they have changed the original idea and made it more action packed.
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Post by stevieg on Mar 3, 2012 5:12:33 GMT -6
Love a good Vampire show, and this does sound very interesting. Be interesting to see when this is up how it goes, as has a good main cast and the concept of the show is intriguing. Looking forward to reading it when it appears Can't go wrong with a good Vampire series.
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Post by stevieg on Mar 3, 2012 4:38:25 GMT -6
Just read the 2 part opening for this idea. First up, I liked the concept, has a feel of several things for me thrown in there. Falling Skies as well as old ones like The Invaders tv series of 60's and Invasion of the Body Snatchers movie. I love sci-fi, and a good series where aliens invade so this was up my alley. The pace of the show moved along well. A few things like how easy Erica allowed Carson free I thought could have played out a bit heavier in threatening as he seemed to give up relatively easy to her demands. A few slight SPAG issues which can easily be resolved also. I think maybe the start could have done with the scenes of Thomas seen been captured and the rest escaping with their lives could have lead to a more dramatic opening of the series of a chase. It would be interesting to see where you take the idea as has potential as the humans fightback. Has lots of elements as said of other influences I feel mixed together which can make it a good show and a nice little webisode series which could last for several seasons. Good luck with it, and be reading more if gets accepted
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Post by stevieg on Mar 2, 2012 14:59:09 GMT -6
Now, I'm probably a bit old for the original series although I remember seeing little clips here and there. I think the concept of the show has, and should have appealed to an older generation if they dropped the 'kids idea' behind it all and developed by someone with a wider concept of the creation. The idea behind this pitch is interesting in this avenue, as it drops the 'childrens show' that it was and takes it into the new generation of more late teens/adult generation. The pitch does look interesting and if done right could prove well, as the characters are there and the idea of the show and what could bring to it in good fight scenes, battles against evil trying to overthrow the world etc is always exciting to watch. Has a good cast for the show already chosen, and be interesting to have a read of the pilot when written to see which road you take it down and what you add to the original concept. Will say, I do love the Rangers logo you created at the top, and the idea of the suits gives it that new edge to the characters that fits an update well. Looking forward to a pilot
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Post by stevieg on Mar 2, 2012 14:27:06 GMT -6
Love the original banner and title card pictures made. Look great with the effects in them that fit the show's concept.
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Post by stevieg on Mar 2, 2012 14:19:49 GMT -6
I think having a look at Torchwood would be good for you, especially the early season which was strongest for me. Also, you could have a look on Wiki, always a good bet to have more information on the show and characters who were on it. Always a source I use for influence in things Also, the name in Caps is fine, it doesn't bother me, but just something I noticed in the script. If that's how you write it and you like it that way then it shouldn't be a problem. It's what you feel comfortable in doing and your style of writing
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Post by stevieg on Mar 2, 2012 9:36:36 GMT -6
Was a little late catching up on this show, but once I did I was blown away by how good it was. I love Emilia Clarke as Daenerys Targaryen in the series, with the dragons born at the end of first season. So hot and sexy.
Looking forward to the 2nd season and see how it goes, but loss of Sean Bean is big and never really was a fan of his but he shone throughout the first series.
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Post by stevieg on Mar 2, 2012 9:26:01 GMT -6
The idea concept is interesting, has also a slight feel of Haven to the show. Good choice of stars to appear in it also. One concern, as suggested is the name of the show. Being a fan of the 'Original' Twilight Zone I'd be concerned about using that name for this show which doesn't have much of a link to the original. A suggestion may be to call it 'Salem' instead? Good luck with the pitch and pilot, I'll give it a read when done
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Post by stevieg on Mar 2, 2012 9:19:49 GMT -6
Just looked the pitch over, and always a sucker for 'superhero' type of shows This does sound interesting. I haven't read the pilot, but from the pitch alone it has a feeling of 'Smallville' and 'No Ordinary Family' mixed together in it. The one concern I may have is the large cast you have. It may be difficult to have everyone included every episode in doing something in the show.
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Post by stevieg on Mar 2, 2012 9:12:11 GMT -6
Just read and loved the opening Pilot episode of the new journey. You really captured the mannerisms and dialogue of both Rose and the Doctor in their moments in scenes. The 'love' between them has those moments that briefly appear and fade away again as Rose finds herself conflicted between the real Doctor and Ten II as you call him. You have left Torchwood a little understaffed, so hope you plan on returning to see what happens to the crew further down the line. Also the introduction of other aliens along the way we know and love (but now daleks every season like RTD kept doing please) ;D This show certainly has potential in the pilot to go places, and with the way you have the characters down as how they should be, and the possibilities of going to other worlds (not always Earth lol) then this could be a huge hit on here I foresee. Certainly be a good show to read each episode when picked up One thing, I picked up on. I think once introduced the characters on screen, don't really need to have them in capitals every time after they appear? A little tip I learnt from others, but it's something you may like doing but just thought pop that little idea in there.
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Post by stevieg on Mar 2, 2012 8:28:06 GMT -6
Okay, just read the first 2 part opening pilot. I have to say, judging from the summary of the show I was intrigued by the whole concept of the show. Something different and unique. Now, although I'm new here please don't judge me too much on what I say as still learning a bit myself and improving all the time and don't mean to give negative feedback on things too much. Onto the episodes, and both moved along at a good pace. The cliffhanger at the end of episode one was perfectly balanced to want the readers wanting to know what happened next. As said by others, I feel the 2nd part ending could have been better - maybe ending on the hospital than back at the office. The characters are certainly interesting. Tori is a gifted detective, who unfortunately doesn't seem to use her gift until the end of the 2nd episode I believe. An intrroduction in the first may have been better. Grey is a cocky young detective. He's going to be an interesting partner for Tori, and the possible confrontations between the two could lead to many a squable over time. Nora Fields is the boss, but at times she feels a little laid back. I think with the way her team work, she should have come across more active and demanding/threatening of the team. Making them scared of her, instead of the arm around the officers approach that seems to be taken with her. The impression I always got with Bosses is that they are there to push the others below them harder than they want to. Like others, Cassie is probably the shining star of the episodes so far. She has a unique way of labelling the team around her with 'funny names' that help identify them in her own way. She has a fondness to protect Tori from what I can gather also, and has a bond there between them already. Adam is a geek, yet for me doesn't come across as much at this time. I think he needs more developing in his character of what he does and how he does it to show him and how good he is at his job. From the opening episodes, their seems to be some 'caring/loving' feeling towards Tori from him, unless I'm mistaken. Lloyd was a good start to introduce Tori's world to us, before his removal of position allowed her new partner to come into effect. Be interesting to see what you do with him now that his role as a Detective has been taken from him virtually - I could honestly see this character having major issues with being stuck behind a desk job and turning to drink or something as he feels and looks like a man who just has to be out on the street working than behind a desk. The scripts were good, and the action nice to read. I did think that it was a little 'bulky' at times and could have been broken up a little more in action slugs than 4-5 lines at a time. The dialogue did at times feel a little awkward, and long at times. One thing I have been told by someone, is to try and make the dialogue a bit more snappy and to the point. At times I felt a line or two may have worked just as well as 4-5 lines of dialogue. Overall, I do believe this concept of show has huge potential and ideas that could drive it into several seasons of storylines. The hospital scene at end of episode 2 had a feel that their is a bigger mystery between the 'Demon Killer' and Tori than we know, which can be evolved over the season with more information in bits and pieces. Certainly looking forward to reading more of the show as it's released and be interesting to see where you take the characters and the storyline. Hope my comments are of some help as I say, this show is unique and does have something going for it in the long run.
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