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I've read the newly released 2-part episode, and I enjoyed it, it was very gritty, the characters felt real on the page for the most part, and I enjoyed reading until the end.

Story-wise, I do have a couple of points to voice, and I hope you understand I am saying them because I am just trying to offer constructive criticism, in order to smooth out some rough edges that I personally have perceived - you may very well already have a plan in mind that I don't know.

1) I was disappointed you killed off the George Eads character so quickly, was hoping to see more of the cop-partnership later on.

2) It isn't really made clear how much the father knows about everything, but saying that, I hope he doesn't know that much, because it's a different twist having them work out their gifts on the fly, whereas going the route of having someone 'teach' them.

3) I also thought the friends accepted the freakiness going on all too quickly, both rolling with it as quickly as it comes.

4) The character of Kyle seemed a bit too stereotypical "undercover evil boyfriend", a la Jeremy from the first episode of Charmed - until the twist of his reveal as still being alive and being used by Amara. This I liked, but it did feel like some of his dialogue - taunting Shannon about how he had to put up with girl crap - wasn't really necessary.

5) Finally, I would suggest a radical re-edit of the 'pitch' is necessary, just for anyone who comes along and reads that, then comes to this page, and sees the episode available, because SO MANY things have changed, it might get a bit confusing for one-off readers who might stumble into it.

A non-story related nitpick - you talk above about casting Nathan Kress as the new Justin, but you credit Darren Criss in the role on page, plus you also repeat the first scene of Act Five, even to the point of having 'Act Five' start again (page 47-50 on my read version).

Okay, a quick chime in from me, having read "Lazarus" a few weeks ago, and now finally having sat down and read "Echo" and "Taken".

Honestly, "Lazarus" felt rather slow and lacking to me, it wasn't one of my favourite episodes, it seemed to drag, although I can't really put my finger on why I'm not a fan of it. However, "Echo", and finally reading the introduction of Kyle, and how he helps Chloe back into the superhero business, definitely won me back over. "Taken" picked up that thread, and I loved the opening of them getting into the game straight away. Zatanna felt very real, and seeing the family side of Gordon made him a lot more well rounded as well.
Although I do LOVE the plot twist, part of me feels a little underwhelmed with the fact that Talia and Chloe are body-sharing, but after all the build up towards Stana playing the part, it does feel like we've been lead up the garden path a bit, although there is still time to pay that off, I suppose.
Helena and Perry, whoa, those two need to set up a support group or something, they don't get any of the luck, I mean, I know Chloe died, lost her job, child and husband, but seriously, their stories are so DARK!
Looking forward to seeing/reading more, Jack, keep up the good work!

no one has posted on this thread yet?! SHOCKING!! Anyway, I came to Winchester late, and am really enjoying finally reading episodes as they come, and in honour of that, and some of the ego-bloating comments in the ChatBox, I present this:

Brady, that's the whole IDEA of the show, the fact that it does keep things changing, both companions AND Doctors, but I do think Tennant's era did go a little too far sometimes, having companions that always seemed to leave in Season finales. That's why I liked the idea that the Ponds would depart mid-season (as it looked liked they were going to), because it harkened back to the classic era where they would leave, and either a new companion would replace them in the same story, or at least, the subsequent one.
Saying that, Martha was one of my favourite, because she was an underdog, brought in to replace the popular Rose, so she became a 'love her or hate her' character, and I loved her, and Freema - the way she evolved, grew and changed, chose the family over the Doctor, and saved the world by herself.

WOOT!! First draft of MSCU 1x02 is COMPLETE!!

Taking a break from it for now, so I can come back to it with fresh eyes for the inevitable 'Edit' round...

struggling with the outline for MSCU 1x05, so instead digging into actually writing MSCU 1x02 instead, and it feels like it's going well so far

BON ANNIVERSAIRE, JACQUES!!!

When I first came to the VPN, I saw the banner for “Winchester” and frowned - was this some kind of "Supernatural" spin-of? I had a friend who suggested something similar, and I immediately vetoed his idea for a fanfilm, because it would be just SO WRONG. Because of that, it took me a while to finally even go into it and read the series breakdown, and I realised how mistaken I was about the name meaning.
I downloaded and saved all the episodes that were available back in March, but it’s only recently, with the build up to Season Two, that I finally got around to reading them… well, that’s not entirely true - I did read the first few, but I found I couldn’t get into it for some reason, although I did enjoy the episodes themselves. I couldn’t really connect with the characters, most probably because the majority of the actors are in shows I don’t watch in reality - I usually use the fact I know an actor to get ‘into’ their character in a VS. But when I did some work on a couple of video projects, and watched some 90210, it revived my love for real-world teen dramas, not to mention the hotness that is Matt Lanter.
So, with that interest awoken, I dived back into the remaining episodes of the first season, with full knowledge that certain characters weren’t going to be coming back for the next season, which I think made me appreciate the development of their characters more.
Pete’s journey was by far my favourite ‘character’ arc of the season - I pretty much loathed him, and almost felt sorry for Michael Trevino being ‘cast’, as he does seem to end up playing douche bags. Being punched by Charlie was his definite low point, and to see him come to the court to help Blake, and the fact he has now become welcomed by the others, shows how far he’s changed over the course of the season.
While I found the storylines intriguing, and not afraid to pull punches, given the subject matter, such as the hostage situation at the school, Blake’s issues with the law, Lucy’s near-rape, there were times it felt that some characters were short-changed for the sake of expediency - Maya for example. She goes from sultry, to revenge-driven, to repentant, and all very quickly - aside from her story with Fiona coming to visit, she only seemed to serve as a foil for the Shane/Lucy relationship, when she could have been more, which I hope she is for the next season. The same goes for Lexie Sharpe - whereas the character of Darren was really fleshed out for his two episodes, it felt like Lexie was simply brought into to be the ‘crazy ex’ - I personally think it would have been better if she had only been injured by Blake, not out righted killed. Given her back story, it felt rather too easy for her to be killed off. In the case of Darren, I saw him killing himself from the moment he brought in the gun to the college, but it seemed what the story needed, and his ‘haunting’ of Charlie was inspired, even if it did seem to just fizzle out and be forgotten about. I was surprised, given how Tracy pinioned that Charlie was using the ‘funeral’ for his Xbox as a cathartic release, he didn’t have a moment when Darren ‘appeared’ to at least wave goodbye. Lastly, the relationship between Jake and Eve came completely out of left field, but perhaps that was the intention? It will be nice to see Jake be there for Eve next season, and how dating the Dean’s son might affect her work with the college.
There was also the matter of spelling and grammar - I know it’s something we all have issues with, but there a lot of moments where I would be reading intently, only to mentally stutter when I came across a word that did make sense. There were a lot of time when “Well” was used instead of “While”, and similar instances, and it takes you out of the enjoyment of reading for several moments because of the non-sequitar.
All in all though, I’m going into Season 2 really looking forward to seeing where it takes the established characters, and how it introduces the new ones. Bring it on, Matthew and Chris!