Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Nov 25, 2012 7:15:09 GMT -6
I watched the pilot of this last night, after putting it off for quite a while, but now I'm sorry I waited so long. It was a really interesting concept to take an urban legend (Woman in White), and make it the central evil bad-guy thingy XD. Sam and Dean are two interesting characters, definitely able to hold their own as central characters. And the ending was so sad, it must have been like hell all over again. You can just see, and feel, that he's slightly cracked before he leaves with Dean.
But anyway, really good concept, really good execution, really good show.
I'd give the pilot 8/10, it was an AMAZING episode but I'd like to see more setting up from a pilot. Hopefully the next episode will answer some more questions, like who killed their mother.
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Nov 21, 2012 16:09:40 GMT -6
This sounds really interesting! A good set of characters and an original concept, I like the fact that Peter isn't one of those cliche partners who sticks with the person through everything (in this case Allison ending up in the hospital), because it makes this so much more realistic and different. Good luck!
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Nov 20, 2012 16:07:40 GMT -6
On my Void episode, I'm 4 pages into the first act, :S but hopefully that'll speed up soon as I get more free time. Meanwhile, Abnormals and Fragment both have 1 page each in their teasers.
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Nov 19, 2012 11:59:23 GMT -6
Because of the sort of complex (but really just confusing) mythology, I've added a glossary. I'm going to add important points there ASAP but if there's something you're confused about, just ask and I'll pop it in there Plus, there's now graphics to get a better image of the characters.
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Nov 19, 2012 10:28:24 GMT -6
This looks really interesting I really like the take on the concept of "door to another realm". Looking forward to this.
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Nov 18, 2012 14:20:15 GMT -6
This sounds really good, I love the concept. You solved one of the problems I have with Spy Dramas, straight away. I hate how, when they do something like Bridget has here, they join with no explanation and then regret it, but with the fact she could die if she didn't join, really fills a hole there. Plus, it could create some tension and resentment between Bridget and the Agency, which is an original idea. It reminds slightly of Covert Affairs (but that's probably just because of my limited viewing of spy dramas), a show I love. Anyway, I can't wait to see this develop more.
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Nov 12, 2012 11:09:03 GMT -6
Thanks for taking the time to read David, graphics are on the way. UPDATE: Only one character bio, episode descriptions and graphics remaining. UPDATE (19/11/12): Only one character bio, episode descriptions and graphics, glossary remaining.
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Nov 11, 2012 12:38:15 GMT -6
Thanks for the feedback Darrin! I'm glad you like the pitch. Whoops! XD I only just reshuffled the character names, and I forgot that Jane was mentioned, in the pitch. I'll fix that up now *facepalm*. Oh, and yeah the change from Unit to Society was intended. I'll try and make that a bit clearer. Anyway, Thanks Again
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Nov 10, 2012 19:00:00 GMT -6
Two Character summaries complete, two have basic "sentence" explanations (to be developed) and one character is still being created.
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Nov 9, 2012 17:30:50 GMT -6
Can I start this back up?
Title: Don't Ask
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Nov 6, 2012 15:53:12 GMT -6
It's Okay I've used Sony Vegas before, I was just wondering if there was a better option, but considering, I'd better go back to SV.
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Nov 5, 2012 10:49:27 GMT -6
Can anyone recommend any video editing software? I only have windows movie maker
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Nov 1, 2012 14:09:26 GMT -6
"We call people like you Vacants. Your different from regular amnesiacs, because we can still find their suppressed declarative memories in the brain. However your brain is completely, apart from your procedural memories, empty. You're not that different from a newborn child."fRaGmEnT Summary Lockquinn, 2082A young woman wakes up in the middle of a barren land, face down on the road. She can not remember anything. She doesn't know her name, her age, what year it is or have any memories. Everything seems alien to her and she can't even recognise her own face. However, she can still strangely remember what most words mean, how to drive a car and skills she doesn't even know the name of. She is found wandering by the Salvation Society, an secret organization that was supposedly shut down by the government after alleged terrorism and corruption. They try to investigate conspiracies and problems the world wouldn't be able to handle without destroying itself. It became a band of extra-ordinary people, on their last options, who try to use their lives to un-cover the mysteries the universe holds, because it's the only thing they can do. The Salvation Society tries to find out the reason behind the woman's (who they've now named Jane Donovan) memory loss and if she could be in the centre of a larger mystery: Breach. The day when global defences where shut down for an hour, one fatal mistake. It allowed the invasion of a considerate number of "Scavengers", a species of extra terrestrials. These "Scavengers" have evolved so that they can adapt to an appearance, which can look like a human to the untrained eye. Nobody knows who is responsible for the invasion, but the accusations are tearing Earth apart. Characters Jane Donovan, portrayed by Kate Mara [/center] Jane Donovan "Jane Doe", is a "vacant" a person who's brain is completely wiped of all sentimental memories but can still oddly remember any skill she's Learned previously. Her sense of morality is still growing, but she still has a "basic" sense of right and wrong, but with most things crossing over into "grey". Her past is unknown, but she seems to be developing and remembering knowledge quicker and easier than most humans find. She lives within the SS Base but is quickly trying to develop an identity and personality of her own, in order to fit in with society. She trusts the Salvation Society but something in her mind is beginning to tell her that it may not be the most normal situation. Slowly, building friendships with Rick and Sam, she's trying everything she can to make herself feel normal. Dr. Samantha Blake, portrayed by Melanie Vallejo Doctor Samantha Blake, was a down-on-her luck, woman before she joined the Salvation Society. Labeled a "genius" and "prodigy" by many just into her 20s, it quickly collapsed when after a brutal attack, she fell into a deep depression. Unable to remain in contact with society, she slowly faded out of the picture and she became a strange once more. Her public image was shattered and destroyed, not a name to make for herself. Trying to re-enter the world of Science, Samantha developed a theory that was vital in the use of teleportation. Before it could be exposed worldwide, Anthony Steele of the recently "closed" Government Salvation Unit, found her and gave her one of the biggest prepositions she would ever hear. Would she like to like the join the independently re-opened branch, and be exposed to wonders of the universe and extraordinary secrets unknown to man, in exchange for time-consuming service and never being able to share any of it. Samantha is a strong woman, who tries to hide her broken mind with sheer optimism and heavy partying. She's estranged from her family, who want nothing to do with her. Anthony Steele, portrayed by Adam Rodriguez The head, and "father" of the Salvation Society, Anthony was still with the agency when it was still affiliated with the government. He secretly re-opened the unit, independently and scoured for the world for people, clinging onto their lives by the fingertips. He's a mysterious and aggressive man, but he respects his co-workers with a passion. He has an excellent knowledge of combat and weaponry from his days in the Military. His sheer brute force is extra-ordinary: he can break somebody's neck without a flinch. After many battles, he has both the physical and mental scars to prove it. He rarely goes out on tasks as a "field agent" and tends to stay at the base, leading operations. He's out of touch with the world, and it takes Jane for him to realise that he's no longer the man he used to be. He has no family, he used to have a wife who divorced him when he became consumed by his job. Rick Walker, portrayed by Theo James Rick Walker, is the only other Vacant that the Salvation Society have came across. Whilst others are known to be found, Rick was the only Vacant found by them and in their care. He was found in England, in what appeared to be the aftermath of an accident, when the Salvation Society was still the government owned, Salvation Unit. To this day, he has still not regained his original memories, but has developed his own, new personality and experiences. Due to the slight numbness from his split personality, and unknown identity, he turned to drink and narcotics. However, unlike Jane, because the government still owned the SS at time, they had access to records, which were able to identity him. He knew his name, his age but he still couldn't find his family. Rick works predominantly as a "field agent", taking physical action on tasks that require it. His relationship with Sam is an unusual one, whilst they sometimes tend to butt heads, they are great friends and find comfort in each other. Wmanoi "Manny" Tnvo'ks, portrayed by Jamie Chung Wmanoi Tnvo'ks (often named Manny, for convenience sake) is a member of the alien race, nicknamed "Scavengers" that invaded earth during Breach. It/She (the species have no specific gender, and tend to just use the pronouns similar to the appearance of their disguise) works with the Salvation Society as part of a deal between them. In exchange for service and observation of them, the Salvation Society observes her and protects her. She works on the field with Rick, where the different characteristics of her species benefit her greatly. Though she may look shy, the woman is tough and very observant of everything around her. She may come off a little kooky, but how normal do you expect someone from another galaxy to be? Episodes 1x01- BlankIn the year 2082, on the outskirts of Lockquinn, a young woman (Kate Mara) wakes up on the road with a case of radical amnesia. Suspected of committing a murder, the Salvation Society take her in for investigation. 1x02- Thief[/u] A man from the past has somehow ended up in 2082, committing a string of crimes. And the SS has to find a way to send him back and stop him before the government can find him. And things aren't looking good for Jane when it looks like they can't find any trace of her identity. 1x03- Stranger[/u] People are going missing and acting unusually in a rural town, outside of Lockquinn when the Salvation Society leave to investigate. But things hit home when it's revealed that Anthony's ex-wife is on the town council, and isn't exactly herself either. 1x04- Apparitions[/u] There's no such thing as ghosts? Or is there? That's the question, when during a freak storm the members of the Salvation Society are all trapped in different situations. And each has their own past to confront... 1x05- Disease[/u] Manny finds herself facing death after contracting an alien virus, which nothing on earth can recognise. Meanwhile, Rick and Jane bond together over their meetings with forgotten friends. 1x06- Mother[/u] After confessing the truth to Rick, Samantha ends up on her first date in a while. But happiness is cut short when she is landed with babysitting a unusual baby found by the SS. And the mystery of Breach is found to be connected to someone in the team... 1x07- Pursuit[/u] On the way to a source who claims to know about Breach but is unable to talk to the government, the Salvation Society's transport mysteriously breaks down in the middle of the desert. And who knows what lurks in the horizon... 1x08- [/u] 1x09- [/u] 1x010- [/u] Glossary TO BE ADDED:.CREATOR NOTES.: This pitch is virtually finished now, but is still the least of my priorities, Abnormals is still more important. I'm currently writing the pilot and will soon release a teaser trailer whose scenes may or may not actually end up in the final script, but will hopefully give an overall flavour of the pilot.
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Nov 1, 2012 11:55:05 GMT -6
I would definetely read those stevieg (especially the fairy tales one, reminds slightly of Grimm) and I love the Spiderman idea Matthew!
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Oct 28, 2012 10:23:47 GMT -6
Pitch Completed! Pilot to be started as soon as possible
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Oct 28, 2012 8:41:34 GMT -6
Chris! That is really good! I would definitely read that
1. Loud Whispers
Looking back at this is so cringe-worthy. It was my first try at a virtual series and you can see the pitch in archived pitches (although the pictures have been taken down).
It was really cliche and the plot was basically just a girl who had an accident, and somehow ended up receiving psychic powers with no decent explanation. She had two friends who knew her secret and basically, the arcs were all over the place. There was no character development and it was a mix between an ongoing feud with an evil classmate/psychic and a batty professor trying to prove psychics exist. There were also random "psychic-of-the-week" episodes in the middle for fillers to reach a 15 episode count. I'm glad to say this has ended.
2. Flawed
I actually really loved this idea and after I lost motivation, I tried to write it as a novel for a while. I had such a large mythology planned out for and the world was really developed. I just didn't put any of this into the pitch and kind of lost hope.
It was a sci-fi miniseries that I had planned to be continuous. It was in a world where a large number of people were mysteriously abducted and the government put their trust in a young man who had discovered how to clone. They would track people all over the world, and replace them with a clone so no one would know no different. A selfish woman in Beverley Hills disappeared after leaving her niece's party, and the government created her a clone. However this clone was different from the others, it was "flawed" and had its own sense of humanity and morality. It broke out and went on the run from the government, taking up a new identity, before working for this government agency and trying to take it down from the inside. There was also an underground society that did the same thing that the clone was trying to do, but it was portrayed that their sense of justice was twisted as well. The woman's niece would eventually run away and join this group, the clone having to hide from her. At the end of the first series, I had also planned this scene where the professor who invented cloning was murdered, whilst trying to kill the clone and it would be revealed that the woman who was abducted was the killer.
I may continue this one day, who knows. This is in the Archived Pitches as well.
3. Hex'd
God, I'm not even going to waste time explaining this. It was a poor, horrible, idea about a teenage half-demon who thinks she is a good demon but it turns out she wasn't. That was it, no other characters, plot, development, even an enemy. So glad, I gave up on it.
4. Lunatics
I gave up on this today, basically it was a mature series about mermaids, who turned into beast-like creatures when under strong emotions or on the full moon. I had a MASSIVE mermaid mythology which was completely re-tooled. There were four mermaids and they were trying to get along in life, but their mermaid-selves got in the way in some aspect. I even had some of the characters planned out, arcs and casted.
I just lost motivation on this and just don't have enough time, and figured even though the vs was supposed to be mature, the mermaid element I had still remained cheesy no matter how much I played with it.
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Oct 28, 2012 7:29:05 GMT -6
I finished the teaser for my Void episode! I really got into the flow and was finding it really fun and then my laptop decided to die on me. But luckily it all saved XD
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Connor J. J
VPN Community Member
Poor Ryan, your life is so bad. Having to to decide: where should I buy coffee for the crap shack?
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Post by Connor J. J on Oct 25, 2012 19:18:38 GMT -6
I'm scaring myself silly writing my "The Void" episode. Halfway through the teaser. I'm going to have to stop there for the night though.
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